One Day I'll Be Free

I saw a picture of myself on Facebook today, an old post from Christmas 2007, and I felt my eyes sting with tears. The emotion I saw looking at myself, a picture of me at my heaviest (330lbs+) and I almost broke down.

That skirt, a part of the suit I had to wear at work, could now easily be used to cover the whole of my body if I needed a blanket. My heart just feels so heavy. I can't believe I let that happen to myself. I made it happen.

There's going to be a lot of recovery needed for me after this. I think I got into a happy head space where I forgot everything that had been, and was focused solely on everything that is to come. Reminders of this ugly past...they don't sit well.

I am still nursing an injured right knee ligament, but I hit the gym pretty hard today. No serious complication with the knee, so hopefully I can hit it even harder tomorrow.

Every weight lifted, every mile ran, every calorie burned, and every drop of sweat is just one more thing to carry me away from all that I was. All that I hated.

One day I will be free.

Eggs out.
xx